Design the copywriter's birthday card. They said.

Comments

[davidthedesigner]

Did you know that Mike Dempsey's a vegetarian?

[Ben]

No.

[davidthedesigner]

Well you do now.

[Will]

Nice. Had you not had a cup of tea when you wrote that?

[Angus]

Brilliant.

[John Dodds]

So when do we get to see the card - you know, the one with neanderthal attitudes, risque puns and stellar graphics?

[Mike Reed]

Now, now, Ben. I'm a writer, and I know exactly who Mike Dempsey is. I love paper. (Sorry: stock.) And that looks distressingly like Times Roman. (Even if it isn't, at least I know that it looks distressingly like it.)

What worries me enormously is how well written the whole thing is. Nice one.

[Craig Oldham]

Posted on behalf of James Denley (Writer).

Subject: writethedesignerschristmascard

Fucking designers, I fucking hate them. They call copy text. Think five point's far too fucking big for body type and that anything longer than three words is too long for a headline. They don't believe that anybody ever reads more than 40 words at a time, despite vast, best selling novels with millions of words in, and even the sports section of the Sun, which is about their level, especially when reading Design Week gets too exciting for them and they can't cope with the adrenalin rush of reading another long article on the decline of well honed typography (with which, I have to admit, I have some sympathy) - and it's true they can't spell or at least only phonetically. Shit, knew I shouldn't have written that, it's five syllables or should that have been silabulls or maybe syllabubs, even, and I believe that they are almost all closet jazz fans and get positively orgasmic over endless John Coltrane meanderings for ever and ever and aren't very rock 'n' roll, although they won't admit it, in case it's uncool and they must never be accused of that, since it's tantamount to getting six points on their artistic licenses and is point blank guaranteed to ruin their amateur standing for all time and then some. And anyway, their houses and flats are always too minimal and anal and tidy and perfectly propped, and they always ask you to come up with ideas for Christmas cards at the end of November, because they haven't thought of any and they can't be arsed and think it's a writing problem. As if all the writers aren't already too busy ripping up the Christmas cards they've written to their Mums, because they didn't like the greeting and they've thought of a better way of doing it, except it's too long and the fucking designers will only moan about it or set it in three point, and besides, not only do I know who Mike Dempsey is, he's one of my heroes. Love and kisses, your old pal, A. Anon.xx

[lauren]

fucking brilliant.

[Friendly Ghost]

Of course, back to back meetings should be 'back-to-back meetings'. Where would we be without copywriters?

Or publications managers, come to that? As in: So, I'm trying to get my fucking designer to talk to the fucking copywriter to come up with a new Christmas card. The designer's too preoccupied with which particular four-cornered Mongolian hat to buy his new kid, while the copywriter's concerned that it might set back her efforts to finish her latest Dr.Who episode. I keep telling them: "Peregrine, stop worrying about hats; Wendy, you're never going to make it to the BBC. We've got to think of a way of filling an A5-sized piece of card with content. I don't care, put a snowman on it - not with a dick for a nose this time Peregrine - and Wendy, if you could come up with something that rhymes with 'house' other than 'mouse', that would be great. I've got a meeting with the marketing manager in an hour and if I tell him we've missed yet another opportunity to get leverage from Yule and hit the ground running before the Festive Period, we're sacked. More importantly, you're sacked. I'm a manager, remember..." So, I go away, and come back only to find Peregrine's looking at yurts online and Wendy's got her Cyberman helmet on...

[Kmuzu]

This from a project manager ..

Damn you creative people, shut your pie holes and get back to work. Microsoft Project says you only got 3.145 manhours left on that ad.

Oh, you're sooooo smug with your coffee and your existentialistic bull crap. "less is more", "form follows function", "Comic Sans is for ass monkies". SHUT UP !! How about this for a philosophy - "Cash is KING!"

Now put a fricking pencil, pen, mouse - whatever it is that you do to do that stuff that we need for the client and get it done.

oh ... by the way .. the client wants to use twelve different fonts in the ad and he has a video tape of his daughter riding a pony that he needs at the end .. it's just a small redo. Ya think you can get it done by lunch? - I'll buy the Taco Bell.

Almighty Kmuzu

[Jason Carroll]

brilliant and spot on

[Coudal]

Excuse the self-link but this seems appropriate to the discussion. "Copy Goes Here."

http://www.coudal.com/cghfilm.php

[minxlj]

hehe this made me laugh - excellent idea

[Tyson]

absolutely love that card....and big thanks to everyone at Coudal that was involved in making the 'copy goes here' short...that was fantastic...
:)

[giania]

Fan-fucking-tastic. I'd know just who to give it to, that wordy sonnovabitch!

[helen]

i'm in love with this, and everyone involved in it.

[SmartFolio]

I agree, well said. Very good website.

[Stu]

I seem to remember a cover from Graphics International or Creative Review that used exactly the same concept. "I've been asked to do the front cover...etc" then a long rambling text about how he was going to do this or maybe that.

This was about 6 years ago.

[web design company]

Excellent !
It will be definitely on my bookmarks list

[sayen]

it gave information about graphics deeply.Thank you for providing great content. I want hear more form you, because I like your style of writing.

[california web design]

Great design. So simple.

kimberly ventura

[A Facebook User]

Thanks for this one :D
I just got a similar exercise :D